Above: Basically all my interactions, awkwardness included, with the male species…
In case you missed Part 1.
I decided to ask him a hard hitting question or two and it was “Why do you think that I always hate you? Why wouldn’t you be a part of my ‘secret circle’?”
By this point I had already told him that I was being honest with him.
He responded [in a gist] that he likes to give me a hard time but also that people say things that they don’t mean.
It hit me then that people say things that we don’t actually mean and maybe he was really trying to see if we were friends since we hadn’t seen/talked to each other in the past two years very much. I specifically remember trying to text him to ask what was up and check in but his answers were always short and simple. I guess things have changed.
I also realized that I really want to have a good guy friend and, yeah, that may be friend-zoning him too quickly but he hasn’t made the move to say that we are more so I assume that we would be great friends. I don’t know…maybe not. I just know that I am ready to move on from this crush and when I would normally run away from any crush either by social interactions in life or social media, with “24” I am at peace in a sense because I don’t feel the need to run all of the time and it is nice.
I also think that because he really isn’t “24” anymore and that I am still 21 that I wouldn’t want to get into a relationship because the age difference of him being older than me tells me that he is at a different place in his life than I am. I am still growing and he is finished with college now.
Funny Fact? I was with my sister for the second half of texting and I held up my phone like a sacrifice because technology gives me an immense anxiety. I should say a phone and not all technology, for the most part, but it really is technology because when my internet goes out, it is a relief at times. I think that it is extremely healthy to be away from technology for as much as possible if you can because you will be able to tell the difference, hopefully for the better.